The 3 greatest gifts men can give to their families

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Men. If you want to know what your family really wants from you, (spoiler, it’s not your bank account), then you’ll definitely want to read this article.

Note: Written from a hetero-male point of view.

Today is Father’s Day, and I can’t think of a better way to celebrate FATHERS and MEN, than to call men to rise up and be stronger, healthier, and happier.

A little context might be needed here: You see, it’s my personal belief that the community of men need to rally together, support each other, and call each other towards greatness. Problems arise when we lack this masculine community, and then rely on our wives to “makes us better men.” Sorry, but that’s like asking our wives to become our mommies, and no grown women want to raise her children and her husband.  #manup #truthbomb

In this article I will directly challenge some old masculine concepts, but also insist that some parts of masculine culture stay very much in tact. 

Let’s go over 3 big ways men and fathers can positively impact their families, and leave a legacy they’ll be proud of. 

 

1.  Love Your Wife.

I know, it sounds rather basic, but hear me out.  First, when you focus on loving your wife, it shows your sons how to treat women. Now I don’t know about you, but that alone is pretty massive, and the world of men needs better role models. It starts with YOU.

Additionally, it shows your daughters how women should be treated by men. Imagine seeing the world through a young girl’s eyes, and watching your father speak to your mother with kindness, love her, take care of her, and support her in all her dreams. Do you think that young woman is going to settle for a man anything less than the greatness of her own father? I don’t think so.

Even if you don’t have any kids, loving your wife is the foundation of a positive and happy household. SAY IT WITH ME. HAPPY WIFE….   😉

PS. Even if you’re no longer married, or in love with the person that used to be your wife, continuing to speak well of your children’s mother shows your children how to act with wisdom and grace. Those are two words I believe the world needs more of.

 

2.  Show up. Be Present.

It’s a VERY common part of male culture to be told that your value as a man is your ability to make income. The more income you can make, the more valuable you are to your family.

Can we please put this outdated and ancient concept of masculinity to rest? Men, please STOP confusing your “net worth” with your “self worth.” Your family wants more than your wallet, they want YOU!

Don’t allow yourself to spend 60+ hours a week at a job to make money, and forget to make memories with your family. When it’s all said and done, what they will remember of you is presence (and the memories you create), and what will pain them is your absence (and the empty space of feeling ignored).
 

 

Yes, you’re right. They want you to be strong, and they want you to be the rock. But they also want you to be AROUND.

As Steven R. Covey reminds us in his book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People:” Put first things first. 

3.  Lead by Example.

I’ve studied great leaders for over a decade now, and I’ll tell you something ALL great leaders do, they LEAD!  Meaning they go first and don’t ask people to do the things they won’t do. They are the alpha of the pack because they EARN the loyalty and respect of those that CHOOSE to follow them.

Q. Do you want your children to grow up healthy and strong?  You be healthy and strong.

Q. Do you want your children to be in a loving relationship?  You be in a loving relationship.

Q. Do you want your children to be spiritually grounded?  Then YOU practice it.

Let’s be honest: Do you want your children to settle for anything less than an extraordinary life? Is there any part of you that hopes and wishes they spend their whole life working a J.O.B. (Just Above Broke), or do you want them to pursue their career or even their calling?  Guess what my friend. They will GO where YOU GO.

I’m curious. If you were to add a 4th or 5th item to this list, what would it be? I’d love to hear your thoughts below.
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About the Author

Patrick Kerwin

Patrick Kerwin

Executive Coach and Founder of Journey Coaching Method™.

Patrick believes that each of us, without exception, has the power to shape our minds, bodies, and lives in any direction we choose. His mission is to help you get the insights, tools, and strategies you need to live an extraordinary life. 

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